Notice where the parking space stripes end, right there under the driver's door. Notice that you could park a fleet of rental cars in the space in front of the truck AND REMAIN INSIDE THE PARKING SLOT. Nice park job asshole.
If you follow me on teh Twitterz, you've seen my pictures of my really crappy park jobs. It's bad, peoples. I drive a tiny little Honda sedan. How on earth I manage to leave most of the car sticking out of the parking space is beyond me.
I wasn't always so shitty at parking. In the 90s, I drove a large truck. Well, I went through several of them, actually. Chevrolet extended cab trucks, a Suburban, and a highly covetable Dodge extended cab truck. Those fuckers can be hard to park. The best solution? Back it into the space. Don't ask me why, but it works like a charm every time. Just ask anybody who drives a large pickup truck, they'll probably tell you--it's easier to park them BACKWARDS.
Sunshine's truck, pictured here (parked by Sunshine himself) is even trickier. Not only is it long wheelbase, it is 8 (eight) feet wide thanks to the dual rear wheels and the fat fenders that accommodate those wheels. (In Sunshine's defense, it is rare that he pulls this asinine shit. He usually does an excellent job of maneuvering this beast in tiny spaces.)
I actually do a reasonable job of parking his giant truck. When in doubt, I park it backwards. It is frightening how well I can park this truck if I just go at it BACKWARDS. (Which might be related to why I function better on stage and in monitor world than out at front of house--everything is backwards on stage and in monitor world. But that is a post for a different day.)
I digress. Back to parking the truck. Or parking anything.
How on earth I can park so neatly, even forwards, in this beast of a truck, and then leave two-fucking-thirds of a fucking Honda sticking out of the parking space is beyond me.
Yet let me go at it backwards, be it car or truck, and it is the picture of precision. Not only do I get the entire vehicle into the space length-wise, I get the fucker centered in the space.
I don't think I was always so shitty at parking. I had to parallel park successfully before I got my driver's license, so I really was able to park a car at some point in my life. I guess all the dope I did over the years really fucked me up. Or maybe it's just ego that causes me to park like I don't give a fuck.
Whatever the reason for my lack of parking skills these days, I blame Sunshine. Wouldn't you, after seeing this?